death by a thousand cuts

 Hello Dear Reader, 

    Hope your well! I have been fully MIA. I have taken a full almost eight months off after an unfortunate job and events in my life. I'm back but not after gaining everything that I have lost back again and have lost it all over again! Life is crazy.

    Anyway I have started working at the gym again, got my Certified Personal Training diploma and done some amazing workouts and had some good and bad days. My hope in this reading is that possibly it will make whoever reads understand that progress is not linear. Like wild. 

    I left the gym last year to pursue a new career and it ended up being such a shit show, I'm not even sure how I got through that with so little bruises. I had a toxic, terrible boss who berated and manipulated me and just fully sucked the life out of me. Too bad because I was working for a kid that I really loved. 

    This whole swirl of crazy shit that has happened reminds me of how much I struggle with moving on and starting a new routine and meeting new people and leaving something that I once loved or someone. But its very interesting because this time, I didn't feel like that. The debilitating angst that came with growth. I think it was partly because of my job now that I love, and I thank whoever is watching over me that I made it back to the fitness industry again because it saved me once and now its saved me again. Really why I think it doesn't hurt as much is because I knew that I gave everything I could until I had run out of options and strength to cope anymore. I feel good about the decisions I made and I wouldn't do anything differently.

Out of that topic, I'm hopefully going to get a position in the company that I really want and think I would be excellent at so that's amazing. I'll keep you updated. Even if I don't make it I'm still so happy with where I am right now. 

Thats all the updating I really have for now, so thank you.